Have you been listening?

Elections are right around the corner.  Debates, reviews of debates, television commercials, this process is ever before us. 

As I was listening to the debates the other night, it seemed like both candidates had something good to say, although I line up with one more than the other, the fact is both of them were passionate about their side, both of them are intelligent men with different viewpoints.  They both desire to head to someplace better, and they both define it pretty much the same way, but the path to that "better place" is very different.

I was thinking about this as I was driving today, and the person in front of me stopped when they should have kept going.  "Why did you do that?"  I asked them, although only I could hear.  "What is wrong with you?"  In other words, "why don't you behave and think like I do?"

Then the connection came to me - we all view the world through our own frame of reference, we evaluate things based on our beliefs, our experiences, our fears and anxieties, our passions...  and then we draw conclusions and they are right!  Problems come when someone else has a view that is different, because that must be wrong - in order for my ideas to be completely right.

The alternative requires a ton of humility to realize that my limited understanding and ability to process information keeps me from being completely right about everything (and for some of us, we aren't right about much).  Pride keeps us holding on to a position of being right, all the while we are devaluing the people around us by making our thoughts the only correct thoughts.

Imagine walking into this world and actually being right about everything.  Think about what it would be like to know all, understand all, comprehend everything, and be surrounded by people who think they do - AND they are not even close.

Christ modeled for us what it looks like to speak truth in love with grace and humility.  It should be so much easier for us, because we are actually frail and imperfect, and when we recognize that humility should come so easily.  However, it seems that we don't listen long enough to hear everything that we need to hear, and we are so self-promoting that we want others to listen to us.

Oh, to be like Christ today in this way - to study to learn truth that I might be able to share it with others in humility with grace and mercy.  God grant me the mind and heart of Christ to be able to respond this way.

At the end of the day, what really matters?

Since I have written last, I have had many thoughts about our God and what it means to "Bless the Lord".  What is interesting is that I find it rather easy to "bless the Lord" with my words, and say the things that are most appropriate, or most "Christ-like", but the thing I have wrestled with is, what about my actions?  What about my thoughts?  What about my innermost desires?  Is God "blessed" because they line up with His will?  It seems so easy to say the things that we are "supposed" to say because we are disciples of Christ, but the question is, is God really blessed if the rest of me doesn't line up with truth?

The aim of our instruction, Paul tells us, is to love out of a pure heart, to have a good conscience and a sincere faith. (I Tim 1:5)  It is not sufficient to be followers of Christ in our language alone, but in all of our actions, attitudes and thoughts.  How else could we maintain a "good conscience and a sincere faith" before our Father who sees all and knows all? 

The truth is, this is another reminder of the greatness of the Gospel in my life.  I am called to "glorify my Father who is in heaven", all the while knowing that my broken, marred, weak flesh cannot do it perfectly.  I need the righteousness of Christ to give me the ability to "glorify God" at all.  Yes, we can get it right occasionally, but perfectly?  Not a chance.

I was writing my daughter yesterday, and I realized even as I wrote that the conversation applied to me as well.  Perfection is not our goal as disciples of Christ because it has already been gained - I cannot add to the perfection of Christ.  However, in fleshing out what it means to follow Christ, I should continue to pursue excellence in every area of my life.  It is a progressing goal that allows for the flesh I still struggle with, but also does not allow me to be satisfied with failure. 

Well, the question was, "at the end of the day, what really matters?", and my thought today is that I seek to love the Lord my God with all my heart, with all my soul, and with all my might, and to love my neighbor as myself" not just in word, but also in deed and in truth!

How do I respond...

"The sun comes up, it's a new day dawning.  It's time to sing Your song again.  Whatever may pass and whatever lies before me, let me be singing when the evening comes. 

Bless the Lord, oh my soul, worship His holy name.  Sing like never before, oh my soul, I worship your holy name."

Matt Redman - 10,000 Reasons

In the past week, I have been through some interesting scenarios and have watched others walk through some deep water.  From my daughter having a stroke, a friend's child having a stroke, a friend having surgery for cancer in his stomach, and now a friend having his daughter lose an arm to an automobile accident.  Deep waters for some people, and I know there are thousands others waking to difficult situations today.  The question is, can I at the end of a difficult day still say "bless the Lord"?

It is so easy to be a follower of Christ when things are working out.  When life goes as I expect it to go, when the day plays out as I had planned, it is simple to praise God.  However, when the day begins with a bright outlook and something happens to turn our lives upside down, is my response still the same?

Lord help my faith be one that would say with this musician, "whatever may pass and whatever lies before me, let me be singing when the evening comes."

Thank you for being a loving Father that knows my limitations and has promised not to give me more than I can bear.  Help me to be reminded of that daily.

Chattanooga Medical Team - Guatemala Trip - Day 7

We head back to the city today, and we have received good news – Fuego is settling down and they expect it to be stabilized by tomorrow morning.  We are thrilled with the news, and we are planning to go to Antigua tomorrow.

We headed home a little after 9 this morning – we had breakfast at 7, but by 8 many of the team members were going shopping at the local market, so we left a little later.  We had a great send off as all of the hospital staff stood outside and waved as we pulled away.  Within about 30 minutes of leaving we approached Rabinal – a little larger city than Cubulco, and traffic was at a standstill.  Sure enough, since tomorrow is Independence day here in Guatemala, we had the distinct privilege of watching a local parade.

We jumped out of the bus, and walked down to the corner where the parade route was turning.  We were able to see the kids dancing and playing instruments.  Our team (mostly wearing their team t-shirts) cheered and clapped for the parade as it passed.  A couple of bulls got lose and Steve almost got gored by a bull horn, so it was very exciting.  It lasted about 30 minutes, but we really enjoyed it.  I told the team that Kenny Hayman had set up the parade for our honor.  Yeah, I know – you can hardly believe anything I say…

We arrived back in Guatemala City without incident about 5 ½ hours after leaving.  Not bad for a parade stop, a food/ice cream stop, and 2 drop offs of the dentist and Kenny Hayman.  Much better than the 13 hours it took Coleman, and the 8 hours it took Berean Bible Church.

We got to Thelma’s house and unpacked our stuff into our rooms.  After about 2 hours of relaxing and playing a few hands of phase 10 we went out to dinner with Brian and Mary, Chad and Marliana, Kenny and April, Phil and Jen, and Nico and his wife.  Karina and Mary joined us along with Marleny as well.  We stayed at the restaurant for over 3 hours.  The team talked and laughed.  We had a great time just relaxing and rehearsing what God had done over the past week.

It is late and we are heading off to bed – tomorrow is Antigua – my favorite activity, shopping!!  I know we are going to have a great time, but we need an early start to beat the festivities that will be going on for Independence Day.

Enough for tonight – more tomorrow…

Chattanooga Medical Team - Guatemala Trip - Day 6

The final day of surgeries and Spanish education – we are all excited but tired.  The morning began as normal eating breakfast around 7 and the team was off to begin surgeries and I started my Spanish class. My class was great – Jose is very gracious as I keep forgetting the things that I should be remembering.  It is coming a little at a time.

After class I had the responsibility to collect the pictures from the team and prepare an Animoto video. The team has about a thousand pictures – which is a ton less than usual, but they did spend 12 hours a day doing the same thing over and over.  Actually, by the end of today, they will have performed 44 surgeries!  By the time they finish working and have dinner, it is dark outside – not much of a good time for pictures.  Anyway, the process was simple, but coming up with what I was going to do was a little more difficult.  Coleman had an idea of what he was wanting, so meeting his expectation made the task a little more difficult.  By dinner time, I had finished it, but I had a terrible time trying to get it to download.  The internet seemed to know what I was doing, and when I got around 90% downloaded, it would shut down and I would have to start all over again.

In the mean time, Del Ashcraft had a case where a woman was supposed to have fibroids, but when he opened her up, he found a large mass of cancer that he believes will eventually kill her.  He did say that even in the states, with this late of detection and being this far along, it is most likely that she would die there as well.  A number of the people on his team were upset, but it was a good time of encouraging one another and resting in the fact that this is not a surprise to God.

As the team began completing their tasks, you could see the relief of the tension they had been living with for the past few days.  Kristen pulled out here fake tattoos that she was putting on the children all week and she put one on Coleman.  That began what can be described as just silliness as everyone on the team received a tattoo.  From roses on the arms to butterflies on the top of the back to a “kissing lips” tattoo on the top of Coleman’s head.  Tattoos were everywhere.  Since I was still working on the Animoto thing, they picked my tattoo and put it on my arm.  It was a heart with wings that spread from the front of my arm to the back of my tricep.  Yeah, I am thrilled with the fact that it is temporary.

Before dinner, I was trying to skype with Caleb (Kendra’s friend) and just as we finally connected, Del asked me to join him and Julio as they went to talk with the family of Pauline (the lady with cancer) and pray with the family.  When we arrived in the room, her husband, Francisco was the only family she has here.  They have 8 children, but they were not here.  Pauline is only 51 years old.  Del did a wonderful job of breaking the news of the bad diagnosis to Francisco and Pauline, and through Karina (the interpreter) he told them that they could possibly pursue treatment, but it doesn’t look good.  They took it very well, but we are wondering if they really understand the permanence of the diagnosis.  I think it might have been some shock since they had believed it was only a fibroid originally.  I prayed with them, and we left for dinner. 

My computer again had lost signal so Animoto still was not downloaded!!  Go figure.  We ate dinner, Jami gave her testimony and showed her video – this is Julio’s daughter who broke her back in the car accident in 2010, and was told she wouldn’t walk again, but one year later was walking.  Praise the Lord.

After the movie, some went for a walk, some sat and talked, I worked on Animoto and finally got it done.  It does look good – praise the Lord, and I hope it helps others in choosing to go on a mission in the future.

Tomorrow we head to Guatemala City – Fuego erupted again today, so  we are praying that going home on Sunday is still possible.  We will know soon…

Chattanooga Medical Team - Guatemala Trip - Day 5

Okay, so the strangest thing happened last night – I heard people speaking Spanish in my head.  No, I could not understand what they were saying, but what is interesting is it was going on in my head.  In other words, there wasn’t anybody actually talking, I was just “thinking” I was hearing it.  The words were able to be understood, and (as is typical) I could understand a few words, but the overall thoughts I could not capture.  Bizarre!

Anyway, today began again with breakfast, a brief devotional from Ephesians, and the team went back to work.  By 8:00 I was back at the computer checking on e-mails, facebook posts and posting to the blog ( we lost internet again last night).  I got some snacks ready for the team, checked on drinks, and then began my Spanish recap so I am ready for Jose to show up at 9.  Karina started asking me questions about Spanish words and phrases. “How do you say…”  I am getting better, but I still feel like a 3 year old trying to talk to college professors.  Humbling for sure!

Well, he showed up and away we went – 2 more hours of feeling like I know less and less. Everyone seems to be getting in on the fun to help me learn the language.  I pray that some of this sticks.  He did something different today – we took a book and translated conversations, we looked at pictures and said what everything was, he gave me a lot of vocab to study.  Tomorrow is adjectives and verbs.  He thought we had another week – I couldn’t handle another week.  It reminds me to pray for Richard Hetzel and his wife as they are going through language school in Costa Rico for the next year.

Eventually Julio took me to the bank to exchange everyone’s money.  $1950 total!  Do you know what it is like walking down the streets of Cubulco with a wad of 15,465Q??  It’s hard to hide. 

The team came out for lunch around 1:30 – rather late – but they had done 6 cases already this morning.  They have 8 cases left to finish today.  They are very impressive!!  Kristen is suffering from a crick in her neck – I tried rubbing it out, but you could tell she was still very tight.  By the way, the doctors and the nurses love the shoulder massages at mealtimes – I think it might even be a highlight.

I wasn’t sure I would have much to write about today, but I was asked to take a moto ride through town to the AMG Airport here in Cubulco.  Yes, AMG has a 28 manzana (I thought it was apples, but apparently it is like “acres”) property that used to be an airport, and now it is a field for 26 cows and 24 people farm some of the property raising corn.  It was a beautiful place – I was thinking “camp”.  Who knows – maybe someday this will be a local camp for the kids.

When I returned to the hospital, I was talking with the team and they told me that they wouldn’t be ready for dinner until about 7, so I sat down and listened to Kendra’s soccer game.  I was sad for her at some level because her team lost 8-2, but at the same time, I was very encouraged because she stopped a number of shots – over 30 shots were made and more than 18 of them were on goal.  The fact that she let up 8 (with one of her teammates scoring on her as well) is difficult for her, but really it’s not a bad place to start – especially since the team she was playing is ranked 11^th in the NCAA division II.

The team finally finished – 16 surgeries in all.  Very impressive!!  About 8 o’clock we were eating and talking.  They were a bunch of buzzing bees – talking, laughing, sharing, etc.  It was great to watch. Shoulder massages all around – everyone was relaxing and enjoying each others company.  Kristen was still tight in the neck, so I took some extra time to relax her neck, but as a result we were able to talk about God, His grace, His Son’s righteousness that has been freely given to us, etc.  What an encouraging time – I pray that others will continue to hear it as she shares with them as she returns to Chattanooga.

Enough for today – last day of class, last day of surgery, last full day in Cubulco tomorrow.  It’s sad, but I am really missing the family and am looking forward to seeing them on Sunday!

Chattanooga Medical Team - Guatemala Trip - Day 4

Today was more of the same.  The team woke up and got ready for breakfast.  As they ate, Brian Dennett shared a little about the hospital, the history, the vision for the future, and the purpose of the ministry.  He had to be brief as the team was ready for work and patients were waiting.

Brian, Nico and Chad were still hanging around and getting ready to go.  Chad and I began talking, and as God lead, I had the opportunity to share my testimony and story with him and Nico.  As always, the difficulty of sharing my arrogance and stupidity, my shame and guilt, was not very easy.  It seems the better I know people the harder it is because I guess I care about what they think about me.  It was another lesson in recognizing that it is really not about me, and if God gets the glory for my failure, I will glory in that.

Around 9:00 my tutor arrived, Jose Leon, and we got back to work.  He is a very gracious tutor, and I am not so sure that I am a very good student.  I will keep trying though.

Today is Theresa’s birthday, so the nationals came out at lunch time and sang happy birthday to her.  She really enjoyed them.  We plan to have some cake after dinner tonight.

The rest of the day was filled with 10 total surgeries for the team – 5 for each group.  In all they have completed 20 surgeries, which is the equivalent of a week’s work here, and we have 2 more days to go.  They still have over 20 surgeries planned.  We will see how the rest of the week goes.  They have had to disqualify a few because of temperatures, and they had to educate a few and let them know surgery was not necessary (for instance, one lady wanted her hemorrhoids removed before they became cancer – they had to tell her that hemorrhoids don’t become cancer).

I was able to see Antonio and Celestine again as they wanted to play ball again.  Kids keep coming by to see us, and probably more importantly, to get candy.  It is a joy watching the doctors and nurses taking opportunities throughout the day to stop and give a piece of candy, or a toy, a tattoo, or a hat to the children.  They are having a wonderful impact on these people.

Dinner was delicious – fried chicken and this amazing potato/carrot/green bean salad  - but what happened after dinner was even more amazing…  I had the opportunity to go to the pastelaria earlier today and get 2 cakes with white icing and fruit on the top for Theresa’s birthday.  We put the candles on the cake and brought it out to her as we sang.  She was overwhelmed.  As the candles burned, she sat almost in tears.  Later in the evening I had the opportunity to talk with her and she shared the emotion she was feeling at that time.  God is good and she was experiencing His love through the rest of the group.

As some of the team sat and talked, others walked the neighborhood and got some ice cream, I had the privilege of doing the laundry for the team.  I know they don’t understand, but it was a great opportunity to serve the ones who have been serving the people here this week.  My role is so minor in all of this, and I can’t help the team with much other than making sure they have drinks and snacks, etc. - having the honor of working on their laundry, getting their scrubs ready for the last 2 days of surgery was a joy.  Every part of the body doing what it is designed to do builds up the body in love.  That is what we are experiencing here as each part does what it is designed to do.

It was a late night, but what a joy it is to see God working in the lives of this group.  I am looking forward to hearing more from each of them as they are experiencing God this week.  Enough for now… time for bed.

Chattanooga Medical Team - Guatemala Trip - Day 3

You can feel the excitement as the team is gearing up for the actual work to begin.  Before breakfast they had the OR air conditioning units up and running and the rooms are ready to go.  I had the privilege of challenging them from Philippians 2 – having the mind of Christ – before we ate breakfast.  By 7:30 they were all cleared out and ready to go.  I was left in the dining room to check e-mails, and prepare for my Spanish lesson.

Nine o’clock rolled around and Jose Leon arrived ready to teach me some Spanish.  Having no idea where to begin, he started with an English book – having me translate from English to Spanish the sentences that were the problems for the English student.  It was fun – I learned some new words and the use of some verbs that I have known, but I have miles to go.

Around 11ish, Dr Kenny Hayman and Dr Coleman Arnold came out and began the lunch rush. I had asked the kitchen staff to have lunch ready between 10:30 and 1 – so the team could come and go as time allowed.  This is actually eating late for home, so it was important that the food be ready by at least 11.  By 11:30 most of the team had come out to eat – soup and hot dogs was our lunch.  Monica Rehring was the last one out – she was staying with a patient while the others were eating.  They ate and got right back to work.  Coleman had said that his second patient was more than he had expected, but they are doing a great job.  By lunch, I believe they had seen 6 or 7 patients.  Since they have 45 for the week, and some are serious surgeries, they are trying to get the harder, more intense surgeries done first – so they take a little longer.

The afternoon was full of excitement.  I worked on Spanish while the rest of the team went back to work.  Realizing they have a passion for diet coke, I made a trip across the street and picked up all the diet cokes they had – 5!  I brought them back and shortly after we needed more.  I began a long excursion through town – tienda after tienda – looking for diet coke.  About the 8^th or 9^th, I finally found the stash – 8 diet cokes.  I purchased them, and headed back to the hospital.  I stopped at one more store on the way back and they had 5 more.  The team is going to be stocked up tonight.  I told the store owners I would be back tomorrow – I hope they have more.

As I headed back to the hospital, I saw Chad, Brian and Nico walking down the street from the other direction.  They had arrived and were planning to go in and see the team in action.  I grabbed my camera and joined them in the operating rooms.  We watched a Gaul bladder being removed, and I took pictures of Drs Arnold and Hinson and their team at work.  Then, while the other guys were hanging out in there, I went next door to watch Dr Ashcraft and his team doing a hysterectomy.  I took some photos of both groups in action.  It was interesting the different dynamics of the rooms – one was very “business” while the other seemed a little more “light hearted”.  I didn’t faint, so I guess it was a good day.

During breaks, some of the team members, Monica, Jim and Kristen took opportunities to give candy, blow bubbles, give yo-yo’s, tattoos to the children who were waiting at the hospital.  It was  a joy to watch them interact with the children.  The kids were so thankful for the items they received – Jim said it brought tears to his eyes to watch Monica give things to the kids.  They seemed so thankful and happy. 

When they left and went back to surgery, I started playing basketball with Jose, Celestine, Antonio and Juan.  We had fun trying to juggle tennis balls and taking turns shooting on the basketball goal.  Many of the adults were watching as we were laughing and playing.  I hope to see them later this week.

Dinner was served around 6:30.  The team was finished – 10 people had been worked on today – all seem to be doing well.  We had steak and rice for dinner.  I gave massages to many of the team members – especially the doctors – and most of them headed off for showers and on to bed.  It has been a long day – tomorrow is another day.  I pray that it is as fruitful as today was.  Thank God for the strength and ability to do all we had to do today.