Amazed and Baffled!

For years now, I have had the privilege of being the recipient of good comments about my children.  From the way they care for others to their lightheartedness to their obvious love for God, people have shared with me how my children have impacted them and their children.

It is this that causes me great pause when I think about my flawed, sinful, and obviously failing history.  I know me, God knows me, and yet He has given me the gift of children that love Him and serve Him well.  My wife has redeemed many of my faults by balancing me out with my children, and for that I am very thankful.

However, I am still baffled by the attitudes and behaviors of my children.  Where do they get this stuff?  They are strong but sensitive, caring but firm, aware of others without being critical.  It is honoring to watch, and I know it is a result of their heavenly Father who has trumped all of my failures by His grace.

Thank you, Father, for giving me three wonderful children and a caring, loving wife.  Thank you for not pouring on me the consequences I deserve in the lives of my children.  Thank you for raising them above my example and grounding them firmly in You.  I pray that they would continue to seek Your face all of their days, and that their children and grandchildren would follow after their example.

I know I am still in the process, and I know that my children are not perfect.  However, I also know that what God has begun in them He will complete!  And for this I am extremely grateful, and to this end I earnestly pray.

A Tribute to Amy Wright - written by Kendra Ivins

Time is an exquisite thing, no one really knows how to measure it, though we try, and it is never able to be controlled or returned. It is an indefinite thing that is always changing. Human beings have always been amazed by the mysterious features of time, such as its beginning and end. This fascination has been shown through movies, stories, books, legends, and even our day-to-day lives. The most unfathomable part of time is how many people get caught up in the mystery and wonder of it but miss out on the limited amount of time allotted to them. Rarely do people truly learn to appreciate and treasure it for the gift it is until it is too late. As the saying goes, “you never know what you’ve got until its gone.” This concept is so often true with time because it is an invisible thing that gives us a false sense of security. Every person assumes the next moment is theirs to grasp until they realize time was never theirs in the first place to control.

Why is this concept of the fragility of time so embedded in my mind? I just drove home from the hospital where a wonderful girl in her late twenties is on the brink of death. I’ve known her since I was a little girl and she was one of the sweetest and nicest people I think I will ever meet. Though she fully realizes her coming fate and is reminded of it with the constant pain, she met us with a warm smile and heartfelt greetings. She held my hand and said, “This isn’t goodbye forever, I’ll see you soon.” Never have so few words impacted me so greatly. Knowing time is almost gone, she stands tall, happy to the end. She doesn’t worry about the loss of time because she spent hers so well filling others hearts with joy and love. Just as she, I want to be able to look back and smile because I know my life meant something. I am not going to wait until it is too late when life is here, to live now. Classes, sports, friendships, work, and basically all areas of my life are affected by this realization. I have always strived to do my best at all of them but now I realize to live each moment like it is the last one and it takes that to a whole new level. Amy, my friend, and her bravery have impacted me, as well as anyone who knows her, because I strive to influence the next generation just as she invested in me. This experience really made me view my project in a whole new way and give me a love for working with children. Amy helped me to realize my passion as she invested in my life at a young age. Though she will be gone, I hope that through continuing her work with children she will remain in our hearts forever.

Written April 26th, 2011 (3 days before Amy went home to Heaven)

How big is your God?

Last night we discussed Psalm 46 in our home Bible study.  As I ponder that chapter, I have to ask, how big is my God?

If I worry about things - my God is too small.
If I depend on myself - my God is too small.
If I stress over change - my God is too small.
If I think I have a bettter way - my God is too small.
If I have to defend myself - my God is too small.
If I rest in my accomplishments - my God is too small.
If I fear the unknown - my God is too small.
If I try to hold on to what belongs to Him - my God is too small.
If I cannot give to others - my God is too small.
If I think He is not near - my God is too small.

What is the remedy for a small God?  I would suggest that the God of the Bible, the only true God, is more than just sufficient, He is more loving than we can comprehend, more holy than we can understand, more giving than we deserve.  He is not moved by our circumstances, but He is moved in love by our responses to them.  He desires to be the high tower we run to for safety.  He desires to be the stream from which we drink.  He desires to be the one, the only means of security for our lives, because HE IS THAT BIG.

If I do not recognize Him as enough, it is not Him that has the problem, but rather my understanding of who He is.  How do I get to know Him more?  Everything I need to know is recorded in His word - if I read it to get to know Him, I will find Him to be more than I could ask or think, after all, He is God.

Small, but not meaningless...

As I sat at Carson Newman this past weekend watching my daughter "try out" for their soccer team, a small butterfly was flittering about by me.  Since I had the zoom lens attached, I snapped a couple of pictures.  It was a blustery day with the wind blowing in various directions.  The sun was shining and it was warm and dry, but that wind was so powerful.

The butterfly did not seem bothered by the wind, it just went about it's business.  Flying here, landing there, taking off and flying again.  No real sense of direction as I watched, but it didn't seem bothered at all.

As I reflect on the day and this butterfly, I think about how small and insignificant this creature is.  It was easily buffeted about by the wind, yet, seemingly unhindered, it continued it's course.  What is the purpose of this butterfly?  As small as it is, and as powerless as it is, it seems rather useless and purposeless.

However, I know that our God has created this creature for His glory.  I couldn't help but watch it as it flew about.  I remember with fondness watching my kids chasing and trying to catch other butterflies, hoping not to harm them in the process.  I realize that although this butterfly has no home, no food stored, no "future plans", it is cared for by God.

How do I respond to these thoughts?  If God cares for the butterfly, if God uses a "meaningless" creature to bring Him glory, what will He do with me?  If God delights in the way this butterfly trusts wholly on Him to provide (because a butterfly does not have the capacity to do anything else), how much more would God delight in a cognitive person choosing to fully rely on Him for provision?

Yes, that butterfly was small, but the lessons learned are not.  God help me trust you when the wind blows strong, when the bills seem tight, when the hard times come.  I know You can handle it, help me to flesh that out by trusting you completely.

A Very Valuable Lesson

 

I can only add one thing - 

the best way to TEACH our sons 

to be that kind of man 

is to BE that kind of man!